I haven’t wrote a review for quite a while now, I think my last one was last summer time which seems like forever ago. We’re now stuck in a year-long winter which is getting a bit boring now. Winter time makes me so sad, I just want to feel the sun and not wear 90 layers and look like the michelin man and so to cure this I make sure I’ve got something on the horizon to look forward to (like a good meal!) Me and a couple of ladies from work have literally had this afternoon tea planned for agesss and it feels like we’ve been waiting for months but today was the day, I had dreams about cake last night I was so excited.
Gluttons For Nourishment is situated in the quaint little village of Tettenhall, quite close to Wolverhampton, and it is amazing. Literally amazing. I’ve been quite a few times now, it’s my favourite tea room by a long shot and, by the looks of the packed out tables, it’s everyone else’s too. There’s been plenty of times where I’ve visited and not been able to get a chair for a good half hour, and it’ll be like this all day, every day. If that doesn’t shout ‘I’M BRILLIANT, RINSE ME OF TEA AND CAKE’, then I don’t know what does.
It’s recently had a bit of a refurb, it’s extended to twice the size and had a bit of a re-vamp too. It’s light and airy, I don’t feel like I’m sitting on top of anyone, and it just screams quaint-come-classy. There’s loads of personal knick knacks like their teapots and wall art, and the use of mis-matched china is spot on.
Gluttons has one of those menus that is just too good, you know the ones? Every visit I have sat in despair trying to figure out what I want because I could devour everything from fresh sandwiches, salads, jacket potatoes, pancakes (PANCAKES), and a range of breakfast items. They also make a diverse collection of kitsch looking milkshakes (I’ve had a gingerbread one before, it was greaaaat) and hot/ cold drinks. However, my favourite part is by far the cake display. If anyone knows me personally then I’ve, at least once, raved about Gluttons cakes. I don’t think I’ve had a better cake anywhere else. SO what better way to try a bit of everything than an afternoon tea?
For £15 per head you get unlimited tea or filter coffee, a selection of sandwiches, hot savouries, cakes, pastries and a scone with clotted cream and jam each. I think now is the best time to mention the staff too because they were so attentive and friendly. Not once did I feel hassled, they were constantly cheery despite being quite busy, they came over and chatted and flashed a smile every time they caught your attention. It’s not very often I come across an establishment with staff this great so that was a bonus.
First came over some little nibbles including crisps, coleslaw and mini sausages in a glaze that I can only describe as heaven (maple/mustard concoction). It was one of those dishes you could devour in a matter of minutes, over and over again, but we were trying to be civilised and sophisticated so we tried our utmost to pace ourselves. I could see the three-tiered stand of holy-ness come out of the kitchen first as I was facing the kitchen and it literally had a halo of light shining from it, I’ve never seen such a beautiful sight. If anyone has eaten out with me then you’d be familiar with me ‘oh my god food’ face, and this was definitely one of those moments.
Sandwiches included egg mayo, chicken and stuffing, roast ham salad, a tuna wrap and a savoury croissant each. What I loved most was the choice, and the croissant was a lovely surprise and all of our favourites too. The chicken and stuffing was my second, but they were all so generous where the filling was concerned which was great.
After an hour of tackling the savouries, it was the turn of the cake. I am a cake fiend if you haven’t already noticed, I’ll look at the dessert menu before the mains, so I am in my element here. We had three massive slices of lemon drizzle, coffee and walnut and a classic Victoria sponge which we divided into three so we could try each. I actually can’t tell you what my favourite was because they were all so good, the lemon curd was beautiful and so was the jam in the Victoria, and the best bit was that none of them were sickly. I’ve had afternoon tea at quite a number of places, and quite a number of times I’ve genuinely felt my heart palpitate after a few bites of cake WHICH IS NO GOOD.
We also had a mini meringue nest, topped with cream and fruit and I honestly wasn’t fussed about eating all of it because I’m not much of a meringue girl, but by god I’m glad I did. It was gone in a matter of seconds. Lastly, but not least, were the scones which were feather-light and topped with cream AND THEN JAM were a great way to finish.
Just a quick note here, if you’re planning to visit for a quick cake stop then the chocolate cake is a noteworthy choice. It’s my favourite because they’ll warm it up for you if you ask and it’s like bathing in molten, rich chocolate and there is clearly nothing better than that.
So after 3 hours and sporting rather large food babies, we defeated that bad boy like troopers. My love for this place has grown ten times after this visit and I could not recommend it enough so GO GO GO.
Tettenhall Arcade, High Street, Tettenhall, Wolverhampton, WV6 8QS